I’ve found Da’Sean Butler’s evil twin! His name is Aubrey Coleman.
Boy, was I disappointed to see what I saw from him. I was eagerly anticipating a courtside look at the NCAA’s leading scorer at 25.6 ppg. What I got was, quite simply, a ball hog. At first, he came out and drilled a few shots, scoring 7 of his team’s first 11 points. It was clear that he was trying to put his stamp on the game. From there, it went horribly downhill.
According to my statkeeping, which Dream Leaguers will generally tell you is pretty accurate, I have Coleman down for five turnovers instead of the official Portsmouth scorekeeper’s innocuous three, four of them coming in the first half. It’s clear that I’ll need a separate blogpost to explain the discrepancies, but let me sum it up: Portsmouth still keeps stats as if the game is a college game. That means you have fewer assists, steals and turnovers going to the wrong people, fewer blocked shots, and rebound tips that are credited to the wrong people. It all makes sense if you watch the NBA a lot. If you ask my scorekeepers who implement our NBA format in Dream League, you’ll understand why the NCAA way of taking stats, like their refereeing, is just too “by the book”.
Anyways, after a 7-for-12 first half, with 0-for-2 from the free throw line, 4 reb, 1 ast, 2 stl, and 4 to, which was outshined by opponent Ryan Thompson’s 20-point, 7-for-11, 2-for-2 from downtown, 2-for-2 from the free throw line, 3-assist, 2-steal, 0-turnover first half, Coleman must have decided he needed to outshoot Thompson. If he was even open for a split second coming off a screen, he’d be shooting it. In the first half, those went in.
In the second half, he shot 2-for-11.
Not only that, he needed to dribble the ball to find his shot. Ugh.
The problem is, he can’t dribble. Totally not a ballhandler. He’s not particularly athletic. Picture Steve Smith trying to dribble past two lines of defense. Not gonna happen. I’d say Coleman probably ended up turning the ball over on 50% of his escapades where he would dribble one way, ignore Jeremy Lin or Nic Wise coming up off a screen from a down low big man, dribble the other way, then get stuck. Therefore, I’m estimating that he did this about ten times. Sounds about right.
Even near the end of the game, as Lin and Wise sat on the bench of a 30-point blowout that was way out of reach, someone in the stands yelled out, “Pass the ball!”
Granted, Coleman hustles. I have him down for ten rebounds where PIT’s official stats say seven. But what he showed me yesterday was not basketball. Not at any level would I want someone like that for my team. If you play rec league or pickup at the park, you know what I mean. We’ve all been there the day the ballhog showed up and happened to be in your five. ‘Nuff said.
I’m a bit flabbergasted by DraftExpress’s apparent recollection of the game…
Aubrey Coleman had 19 pts on 9-23 shooting. Overdribbled somewhat but did some impressive stuff at times. Jeremy Lin had 6 assists
“Somewhat”?! I’m sorry, but if you’ve played at the playground with Mr. Ballhog, you don’t care how impressive the guy’s stuff was (it wasn’t — not nearly as impressive as Thompson’s or AJ Slaughter’s, for that matter). You only remember how he disintegrated your team chemistry.
Sorry to be so harsh, but maybe you just have to grow up as a balla, play on a varsity squad, go off to college to organize and recruit your own intramural teams, then coach and GM your own formal adult tournament teams in selecting all-stars from the many players you know, as we do in the Dream League world, to understand this.
You want basketball players, first and foremost.
The only time you’d want a player like this is if you can’t find other talent and you are forced to complement the scorer-ballhog with inferior pieces. But it is disrespectful for Coleman to assume that his PIT team is stocked with inferior pieces. And with Lin and Wise, it’s simply not true.
Now, maybe Coleman isn’t really like this and just strategized this game wrong, in front of NBA scouts. That is maybe forgivable, but those of us who’ve been down to the park, we’re skeptical, you know. We will see.
NOTE: I’ve categorized this in “inspirational”, but it’s obviously the opposite. I wanted this blogpost to appear next to Da’Sean Butler’s (linked at the beginning of this post), so you could see the “evil twin” metaphor, side-by-side.
You might also like:
- DraftExpress’s Portsmouth notes on Jeremy Lin
- Portsmouth prospecting: Just draft Ryan Thompson already!
- Portsmouth prospecting: the assist machine Jeremy Lin
- 4 (four!) of our Dream League refs make it to the NBA
- What Jeremy Lin’s up against at Portsmouth
- Obscure rules: the flagrant 2-for-1
- Ed Wang, a tad taller than Jeremy Lin
- Meet Mr. Crunch-Time: Jeremy Lin
